I don't usually have dreams that really scare me. I've had dreams that have made me cry, I've had dreams where I've woken myself up because I was actually laughing out loud, and I've even had a dream in French once, and I don't speak a word.
Last night though, I had a dream that actually scared me, and I couldn't seem to get away from it. This is what happened.
You know all the black and white war photos you see in history classes and such from like, 9th grade on? Well, imagine (or don't, it's sad) that you're watching all those horrible things happen, but not with the noises that go along with them, just silence, and the occasional film noise. Allow me to explain the film noise part. It's like when you watch a movie and you can hear the film turning on the reels...you understand? I hope so...it's the sound that you hear if you stay through the very end of the credits and everything is black...except it wasn't all black, it's these terrible scenes. Everything from the holocaust to my imagination's version of the final battle between the Nephites and the Lamanites. All silent, all playing before my eyes, not like a movie, but like a play, with movie quality...in 3D. In the corner of the stage there's a little boy, also in black and white, and he's about 9, and wearing like, old English school-boy clothes. He's watching the same scenes, while moving closer to me. I can't see his face though, and somehow I know (don't you love how you just know things in dreams?) that if I see his face, that I will die, because this little boy is death embodied.
Well, finally, the boy has moved to the point where he's right in the center of my line of vision, and he starts to turn around really slowly, and I know what's happening, so I wake up, for real. I lay in bed for a few seconds scared to go back to sleep, but I manage to do it anyway.
A few minutes later, I'm in the same dream, and it's only a little rewound from the place that I was when I'd last woken up, and he was still moving towards me, and turning...
And that's how my night continued for a little while, I got this kind of morbid curiosity after a little while, where I wanted to know what he looked like, but I knew I would die if I saw him.
I never did see death, and I'm very much alive today, I'm just wondering one thing:
What on earth did I eat that made that horrid dream happen?
Thursday, March 03, 2005
Tuesday, March 01, 2005
TV is the Devil
Well, at least TV Preview...
I mean, I was all psyched up to go...DOOR PRIZES!!
I didn't win anything...and sadly, neither did Uffish or Wafflewitz...'twas really tragic.
On top of that, we sat through 2 hours of the worst TV ever. I was really glad that we got the chance to tell them what we thought of it, because I certainly had some opinions on the topics. The first show was called "Soulmates." Basically, it opperated on the premise that these two people had met in a past life, and they were trying to get together in successive lives, and this episode was all about her trying to figure out where she knew this guy from.
My critique stated the following: This show had the sentimentality of a middle-school diary, and was equally worth my time.
The second show was one that used to run on TV, and they're thinking about redoing it for TV again. The actors in it were pretty good, but it was still a dumb show. Thumbs down for both.
On top of all that, there were commercials...and not very good ones. In fact, there was the worst Dorritos commercial EVER in there. Somehow though, I still found myself wishing for the commercials to come, rather than watching the TV shows.
On top of all this insult, my cell phone was picked up by someone while there. It had been in my purse...but it wasn't there when I left. I called and got it suspended so that it couldn't make any calls, or recieve any, and then sent my mom an e-mail about the whole thing. I actually went back to the hotel where they'd held the whole thing yesterday, and someone had turned it in, so I'm not sure what happened there. Anyway, that sorrowful part is now fixed. :D
AND we didn't win anything! I felt justified in keeping the stupid pen they included with our rating packet...at least then I'd take something from the evening.
It was a terrible evening, minus the company. Uffish and Wafflewitz are really great people to hang out with by the way, if you're lucky enough to try it sometime-take the opportunity. Phoenix even brought over some of his cure-all remedy...Ice Cream, and then a bunch of us watched most of White Christmas. Hooray for friends who can help cheer you up.
I thought I was done with the awful TV Preview people forever. I didn't win, I didn't like them, and I'd lost 2 hours of my precious youth for them. I bet I'll regret that when I'm like...50.
Well, today, they found me.
I get a phone call from the people. They had the audacity to call me! ME! Who told them exactly what I thought of their stupid TV Preview with the comment that they needed "more prizes, and T-shirts, free ones." These people wanted another 10 minutes of my life! Their justification was that it'd had been a few days and they wanted to get my opinions after the fact.
Oh, did I have opinions.
I could have just hung up on them...but I decided to give them what they wanted. They'd likely be getting hung up on by most people anyway right?
I did the entire thing monotone...no change in my voice whatsoever. part of our conversation went like this:
"Do you remember seeing a Secret Body Sprays commercial?"
"Yes"
"What ideas were presented in the commercial?"
"That if you wear their spray you'll be a sexy lady and have success with men."
"Were there any other ideas presented in the commercial that you noticed?"
"You won't stink."
She didn't so much as titter.
"Do you remember seeing a Bounty Paper Towel Commercial?"
"Yeah."
"What ideas were presented in the commercial?"
"Bounty is better than the leading competitor."
"Were there any other ideas presented in the commercial that you noticed?"
"Bounty is better at absorbing green water."
Poor lady. Oh well, it was awful. She asked me if I would consider coming back if I were invited again. I said "Probably not." She replied, "Is that a yes or no?"
"No." DUH!
Anyway, if anything else, I hope that Uffish, Wafflewitz and I helped to save the world from some kind of horrible programming, because that, my friends, is why the Youth of America are becoming so darn stupid.
TV is the Devil.
I mean, I was all psyched up to go...DOOR PRIZES!!
I didn't win anything...and sadly, neither did Uffish or Wafflewitz...'twas really tragic.
On top of that, we sat through 2 hours of the worst TV ever. I was really glad that we got the chance to tell them what we thought of it, because I certainly had some opinions on the topics. The first show was called "Soulmates." Basically, it opperated on the premise that these two people had met in a past life, and they were trying to get together in successive lives, and this episode was all about her trying to figure out where she knew this guy from.
My critique stated the following: This show had the sentimentality of a middle-school diary, and was equally worth my time.
The second show was one that used to run on TV, and they're thinking about redoing it for TV again. The actors in it were pretty good, but it was still a dumb show. Thumbs down for both.
On top of all that, there were commercials...and not very good ones. In fact, there was the worst Dorritos commercial EVER in there. Somehow though, I still found myself wishing for the commercials to come, rather than watching the TV shows.
On top of all this insult, my cell phone was picked up by someone while there. It had been in my purse...but it wasn't there when I left. I called and got it suspended so that it couldn't make any calls, or recieve any, and then sent my mom an e-mail about the whole thing. I actually went back to the hotel where they'd held the whole thing yesterday, and someone had turned it in, so I'm not sure what happened there. Anyway, that sorrowful part is now fixed. :D
AND we didn't win anything! I felt justified in keeping the stupid pen they included with our rating packet...at least then I'd take something from the evening.
It was a terrible evening, minus the company. Uffish and Wafflewitz are really great people to hang out with by the way, if you're lucky enough to try it sometime-take the opportunity. Phoenix even brought over some of his cure-all remedy...Ice Cream, and then a bunch of us watched most of White Christmas. Hooray for friends who can help cheer you up.
I thought I was done with the awful TV Preview people forever. I didn't win, I didn't like them, and I'd lost 2 hours of my precious youth for them. I bet I'll regret that when I'm like...50.
Well, today, they found me.
I get a phone call from the people. They had the audacity to call me! ME! Who told them exactly what I thought of their stupid TV Preview with the comment that they needed "more prizes, and T-shirts, free ones." These people wanted another 10 minutes of my life! Their justification was that it'd had been a few days and they wanted to get my opinions after the fact.
Oh, did I have opinions.
I could have just hung up on them...but I decided to give them what they wanted. They'd likely be getting hung up on by most people anyway right?
I did the entire thing monotone...no change in my voice whatsoever. part of our conversation went like this:
"Do you remember seeing a Secret Body Sprays commercial?"
"Yes"
"What ideas were presented in the commercial?"
"That if you wear their spray you'll be a sexy lady and have success with men."
"Were there any other ideas presented in the commercial that you noticed?"
"You won't stink."
She didn't so much as titter.
"Do you remember seeing a Bounty Paper Towel Commercial?"
"Yeah."
"What ideas were presented in the commercial?"
"Bounty is better than the leading competitor."
"Were there any other ideas presented in the commercial that you noticed?"
"Bounty is better at absorbing green water."
Poor lady. Oh well, it was awful. She asked me if I would consider coming back if I were invited again. I said "Probably not." She replied, "Is that a yes or no?"
"No." DUH!
Anyway, if anything else, I hope that Uffish, Wafflewitz and I helped to save the world from some kind of horrible programming, because that, my friends, is why the Youth of America are becoming so darn stupid.
TV is the Devil.
Sunday, February 27, 2005
Great Song
OK, this is my favorite song, I think it's absolutely awesome. It's called "Lasagna" and it's by Cherie Call.
Tried to eat some lasagna today.
It didn't taste how it did when I made it
Come to think of it, that was Tuesday,
Maybe I shouldn't have saved it.
The microwave gives it a radioactive crisp,
Which is not what you're after.
I still have half a pan left
Wish you were here.
Went to a resturant and saw these two,
They had a table near the band.
And when the band played a slow one,
He reached over to touch her hand.
Well, I think they saw me staring,
So I went to pay the bill.
But somehow it made me
Wish you were here.
It's not like I can't stand on my own,
It's not like I don't have friends who will call on the phone,
And boys who will take me out,
That's not what this is about.
Cause I've never missed you before,
But lately sometimes I do.
And I don't know where you are,
Or if there's even such a thing as you.
All I know is today hasn't been any different
From any other day of any year.
Maybe that's what's wrong
Wish you were here.
Well you've been gone too long.
Wish you were here.
Ooo Ooo Ooo Ooo
Wish you were here.
It doesn't leave you feeling like..."awwww, poor me," either. It makes you go, "Huh, there's someone out there just for me."
Yeah...Novel's feeling really sappy right now...anyone want half my Twix?
Tried to eat some lasagna today.
It didn't taste how it did when I made it
Come to think of it, that was Tuesday,
Maybe I shouldn't have saved it.
The microwave gives it a radioactive crisp,
Which is not what you're after.
I still have half a pan left
Wish you were here.
Went to a resturant and saw these two,
They had a table near the band.
And when the band played a slow one,
He reached over to touch her hand.
Well, I think they saw me staring,
So I went to pay the bill.
But somehow it made me
Wish you were here.
It's not like I can't stand on my own,
It's not like I don't have friends who will call on the phone,
And boys who will take me out,
That's not what this is about.
Cause I've never missed you before,
But lately sometimes I do.
And I don't know where you are,
Or if there's even such a thing as you.
All I know is today hasn't been any different
From any other day of any year.
Maybe that's what's wrong
Wish you were here.
Well you've been gone too long.
Wish you were here.
Ooo Ooo Ooo Ooo
Wish you were here.
It doesn't leave you feeling like..."awwww, poor me," either. It makes you go, "Huh, there's someone out there just for me."
Yeah...Novel's feeling really sappy right now...anyone want half my Twix?
Friday, February 25, 2005
The Wheels on the Bus...
I just rode the bus home from Orem, and had a 35 minute talk with the bus driver. It turns out that he loves history too, and so, as we talked about different regions in the USA, we were able to pepper our speech with various historical references that were really funny, as long as you had some idea of the history behind them...
Here's to getting out and talking to random people...and here's even more to finding out that you actually have things in common with them. :D
Here's to getting out and talking to random people...and here's even more to finding out that you actually have things in common with them. :D
Thursday, February 24, 2005
Funny Feet
I've been really amused by my feet today...and I can't really figure out why. Oh well, here's a poem to go with them:
FUNNY FEET
Funny Feet, funny feet
Oh, I have such funny feet.
Left then right,
To and fro,
They always know
which way to go!
Oh elementary school...
Wednesday, February 23, 2005
Hey Friends...Did You Miss Me?
Ahoj all (that's Czech by the way),
Don't worry, I don't actually expect any of you to answer that question. I just kind of feel like musing right now...any of you guys have to write songs or something? I could probably be some good inspiration...probably. Or maybe not.
Before you continue any further, this will likely be really incessant babble, you've been warned, proceed at your own risk.
To start off, I really like people. I like to talk to them, I like to be around them, I like to hear their stories, and figure out where they're coming from. I like to hear their opinions on things. I don't often like to share mine readily on certain topics, but I will eventually.
I really like smells, and I have a pretty good smell-memory correlation. When I was checking out colleges, I visited Mars Hill, and their history wing smells just like the cafeteria of Cherry Hill Elementary school here in Utah-I went there for a couple of years...kinda. That's where I got one of those color-changing mustang shirts. I was cool for like...30 seconds.
I really like change. I like to adapt, and to do new things, and to grow (well, except for my hair, and I'm not really getting any taller either...but I'm sure you get what I mean.). If I'm doing one thing for too long, I start to feel like I'm stagnant. Just this morning, I was getting ready to go to class, and I noticed that the bottom layer of my short haircut was getting a little long. In fact, it was approaching the lines of "mullet." Those are lines that I refuse to cross, so I cut it off. Just like that. there goes about an inch of hair. I don't think that many people can understand why I do these things...I can't really understand it. For me, some days it's easier to just cut a little bit off my hair than to figure out what to do with it. Consequently, my hair ends up pretty short, and nearly every time someone asks "did you get a haircut" I can answer yes, because it's true.
I also really like soft blankets. Who doesn't?
I don't like the assessment part of school. It's not because I'm terrible at it, it's just because it seems to take the fun out of it. Religion tests, papers, homework...they're all things that I just don't particularly enjoy doing. I like class, especially when I have good professors, and I have the chance to participate and discuss, and I also don't mind reading. For me, it's the rest of it that sucks the fun out...but oh well. When I rule the world....
Ok, that's probably enough for now. I'm sure that you'll get some more later. Maybe I'll even jump on the quiz bandwagon at some point...maybe not. We'll see. Until later friends, have a nice night.
Don't worry, I don't actually expect any of you to answer that question. I just kind of feel like musing right now...any of you guys have to write songs or something? I could probably be some good inspiration...probably. Or maybe not.
Before you continue any further, this will likely be really incessant babble, you've been warned, proceed at your own risk.
To start off, I really like people. I like to talk to them, I like to be around them, I like to hear their stories, and figure out where they're coming from. I like to hear their opinions on things. I don't often like to share mine readily on certain topics, but I will eventually.
I really like smells, and I have a pretty good smell-memory correlation. When I was checking out colleges, I visited Mars Hill, and their history wing smells just like the cafeteria of Cherry Hill Elementary school here in Utah-I went there for a couple of years...kinda. That's where I got one of those color-changing mustang shirts. I was cool for like...30 seconds.
I really like change. I like to adapt, and to do new things, and to grow (well, except for my hair, and I'm not really getting any taller either...but I'm sure you get what I mean.). If I'm doing one thing for too long, I start to feel like I'm stagnant. Just this morning, I was getting ready to go to class, and I noticed that the bottom layer of my short haircut was getting a little long. In fact, it was approaching the lines of "mullet." Those are lines that I refuse to cross, so I cut it off. Just like that. there goes about an inch of hair. I don't think that many people can understand why I do these things...I can't really understand it. For me, some days it's easier to just cut a little bit off my hair than to figure out what to do with it. Consequently, my hair ends up pretty short, and nearly every time someone asks "did you get a haircut" I can answer yes, because it's true.
I also really like soft blankets. Who doesn't?
I don't like the assessment part of school. It's not because I'm terrible at it, it's just because it seems to take the fun out of it. Religion tests, papers, homework...they're all things that I just don't particularly enjoy doing. I like class, especially when I have good professors, and I have the chance to participate and discuss, and I also don't mind reading. For me, it's the rest of it that sucks the fun out...but oh well. When I rule the world....
Ok, that's probably enough for now. I'm sure that you'll get some more later. Maybe I'll even jump on the quiz bandwagon at some point...maybe not. We'll see. Until later friends, have a nice night.
Friday, February 18, 2005
Vegas or Bust
Guess what friends!
I just went WAR DRIVING!!! We just found an internet connection from some place across from an OBGYN…the name of the connection was “
Oh the covertness that is Novel Concept. I’m freakin’ amazing!
So…
On a more unrelated note, some of you may have seen the blog that I did about when we drove from
Wow…suddenly we’re in
GUESS WHAT?!?! We just found I-15! We’ve been driving around for a little while trying to follow the signs to the interstate…and it’s not been working. Finally, we’re getting there….as soon as all these other silly cars stop coming.
Woo Hoo! We just found our exit…sweet sassy molassy. This is gonna be amazing. I’m afraid I’ll have to go for now…I’ll write some more later. I have a feeling this is going to be an entirely blog-worthy trip.
Thursday, February 17, 2005
Tuesday, February 15, 2005
Reasons I need a Kitchen...Part I
You know those days where you just know that after it's over, you'll look back and laugh?
Today was one of those occasions where you know you'll look back and laugh, and you get to laugh whilest it's happening too...
So, I'm an RA, and without kitchen. This isn't generally a problem. I have friends with kitchens, and enough meal prowess (read: mooching ability) that I'm usually able to avoid the cafeteria.
Well, today, being without kitchen became a huge problem.
I ordered a cake for a floor birthday party about a week ago, and I took the order to the appropriate persons to get said cake. It was a simple order: white cake, cut into 35 pieces, to be delivered today, February 15th. I called today to check on the order, and to see if my cake was coming. The person in charge of ordering had already gone home for the day, so I checked with the next person available...who didn't know. She kindly offered to call the first person to see if he had ordered the cake, and then call me back.
I got a call back a little while later that said that I was supposed to have reminded the first person, and kept coming back between when my order was due and when I'd put it in, because the order had ended up getting lost among some other financial papers. Because I had failed to do this, my cake had not gotten ordered. Was this going to be a problem? "No, that's ok." I said...only partially thinking it was a lie-really just a setback. Sure, it was a really inconvenient setback, but these things are workable right? I had about 3 hours until I had to go to a meeting, and that was plenty of time to get some cake or something made right?
Riiiiiight...
So I go to the store and I get some cake mix, frosting, ice cream, and cupcake holders. Individual cakes are cool too right? Sure, they weren't what everyone was hoping for, but it was still cake, and we're girls, and we have ice cream...this should be good enough right?
I realize that the oven in my building is broken, so I've got to go to another building. I go to the first one, to find the oven in use, and then the second, to find a free oven. HUZZAH! I've also only got 12 cupcake holders...which means that I've got to cook about 4 batches of cupcakes...that=80 minutes of sitting in someone else's basement and watching TV. I NEVER watch regular TV...especially sitcoms. I love movies, but I'm just not a huge fan of too many TV shows, let alone "that 70's show" and "American Idol."
Now, you'd think I could cook about 48 cupcakes without incident right?
Wrong.
Due to the limited resources, I put the cupcakes into a bag after they're out of the oven so that I can carry them all back to my building. The cupcakes in the bag promptly decide to no longer maintain their cup-cakey shape, and become cup-crumbs...and the party is supposed to start in an hour...and the cake mix is almost all gone, and there's no peace in the middle east, andmyshoesareuntiedbecausetheydon'thaveanytiesand....
Yeah, it ALMOST happened like that. Except instead, I just started to laugh. The whole situation was entirely ridiculous, and I couldn't help but just start laughing. This lasted all the way back to my room, where I got a hold of the hall advisor, who told me that I could go and buy another cake if I wanted to.
With nothing but some crummy looking cupcakes in the bag, I called up Phoenix who took me, and Uffish to the store to buy a cake. After a short selection time, I picked out a white $17.00 1/4 sheet cake, almost exactly what I'd ordered in the first place.
It gets even better from there-while standing in line for a cashier due to the fact that there wasn't a barcode on this cake, the manager comes up and tells me that I can go to the self-checkout lane. I explain the barcode issue and she says, "umm...$10.00- just tell her it's $10."
Bonus, I just saved $7.00 on a cake...more budget money for me!
I get the cake back, and with some assistance from Uffish, got the party all set up. There weren't as many people as I'd hope for, with all the stuff that went into it...but there were enough, and we had just enough cake-no waste.
Hahahahahahaha.....
Monday, February 14, 2005
If I Were a Bell...
Oh the joys of Valentines Day!
For one whole day a year, I can think all the sappy, sentimental, pink and mushy thoughts that I want to, and they're allowed to show all over my brightly beaming contenance. I can walk around with the idiot smile, and no one else really cares...or at least no one else expects me to explain myself. This is, after all, a day entirely devoted to pink, love, and the happy little girl giggle...
Or something like that.
Favorite SAD Valentine I've heard today:
I'm not yours,
You're not mine
won't you be my anti-valentine?
MMMmmmmMMM...life :D
For one whole day a year, I can think all the sappy, sentimental, pink and mushy thoughts that I want to, and they're allowed to show all over my brightly beaming contenance. I can walk around with the idiot smile, and no one else really cares...or at least no one else expects me to explain myself. This is, after all, a day entirely devoted to pink, love, and the happy little girl giggle...
Or something like that.
Favorite SAD Valentine I've heard today:
I'm not yours,
You're not mine
won't you be my anti-valentine?
MMMmmmmMMM...life :D
Sunday, February 13, 2005
Return of the Jedi
Ok, so it's really just the return of the nametag...but it IS a source of some power...
It's been "missing" for about 3 weeks now...maybe a month, and I've felt it's absence distinctly. The shiny golden background of it, encasing the regally carved letters that make up my name and position, they do something for you. I didn't realize the power that was to be had in simply playing with it's magnetic backing, and having it stuck to the doorjam of my room.
Somehow, having it back in its position says something like, "Finally, there is again order in this chaos." This badge is my "Magic Feather" and with it, I can fly.
OK, not really, but it IS cool. At least a lot cooler than the "Pearls of Authority." Somehow, those things just weren't cutting it.
It's been "missing" for about 3 weeks now...maybe a month, and I've felt it's absence distinctly. The shiny golden background of it, encasing the regally carved letters that make up my name and position, they do something for you. I didn't realize the power that was to be had in simply playing with it's magnetic backing, and having it stuck to the doorjam of my room.
Somehow, having it back in its position says something like, "Finally, there is again order in this chaos." This badge is my "Magic Feather" and with it, I can fly.
OK, not really, but it IS cool. At least a lot cooler than the "Pearls of Authority." Somehow, those things just weren't cutting it.
Friday, February 11, 2005
FCCLA- Family, Career, and Community Leaders of America
I just spent lunch with the future of our country...And I have to say-the future looks...Well, trendy?
After some careful observation with a friend, we've come up with some very important things you need to know if you ever plan to become a leader in your Family, Career, or Community.
Sensible shoes-wearing these makes people realize that you, too, are sensible. Also, they show that you can aspire to new heights on the inside-you don't need material goods to do it.
Jean Skirts-wearing these shows that you're in touch with the pulse of the people, without actually stooping to their level. You're wearing jeans AND a skirt-how much more do you want?
Hunting Jacket-don't wear these, it just screams "I HATE ANIMALS!!!" You're not going to get anywhere with animal lovers hating you too much.
Teddy Bear-carry one of these, because it shows that you're compassionate, and you love animals. Either that, or it shows that you need one of the next with you...
Mommy-it's ok to let her stay home after awhile...Really. She probably gets sick of hanging around anyway.
Lip Ring-far to distracting when speaking...And gross looking. Which brings us to...
Language (Crap, Ex-lax)-if you call your friends ex-lax as a term of endearment...I don't want you. Also, if you use the word 'crap' you're clearly a potty mouth and have no business being around people of high repute.
crap...
Ice Cream-do not follow everyone else to the ice cream machine. If you do, you are a lemming, and you obviously promote obesity in America...Obviously.
Whimsical Shoes-now, these need to be sensible tennis shoes with blue, yellow, and green swirls on them. These shoes will not likely get you the ultimate leadership opportunity-though they may allow you to work your way into congress or something. I think quirky might work for that.
Collared Shirt-You have to have a collared shirt...And a tie-otherwise, how on earth are people supposed to trust you? Well, if you're male-girls need a skirt. The skirt suit on girls says "I'm a business women" a lot more than it screams "elect me!" though.
Untucked Shirt-guys shirts must be tucked in. The flap in the back that covers your backside indicates that you're looking to cover your own behind before looking out for the team. While this may be a statement of truth, you want people to at least believe you're entirely sincere.
Puff Paint-Don't use this, it just makes you look like you tried to be crafty without any real tools available...
Yeah, those are the things I learned. Shallow? Critical? Cynical maybe? It's always possible...But Uffish is revealing werf's gender today, along with 'nyms-I'm sure you guys are MUCH more interested in that anyway. :)
After some careful observation with a friend, we've come up with some very important things you need to know if you ever plan to become a leader in your Family, Career, or Community.
Sensible shoes-wearing these makes people realize that you, too, are sensible. Also, they show that you can aspire to new heights on the inside-you don't need material goods to do it.
Jean Skirts-wearing these shows that you're in touch with the pulse of the people, without actually stooping to their level. You're wearing jeans AND a skirt-how much more do you want?
Hunting Jacket-don't wear these, it just screams "I HATE ANIMALS!!!" You're not going to get anywhere with animal lovers hating you too much.
Teddy Bear-carry one of these, because it shows that you're compassionate, and you love animals. Either that, or it shows that you need one of the next with you...
Mommy-it's ok to let her stay home after awhile...Really. She probably gets sick of hanging around anyway.
Lip Ring-far to distracting when speaking...And gross looking. Which brings us to...
Language (Crap, Ex-lax)-if you call your friends ex-lax as a term of endearment...I don't want you. Also, if you use the word 'crap' you're clearly a potty mouth and have no business being around people of high repute.
crap...
Ice Cream-do not follow everyone else to the ice cream machine. If you do, you are a lemming, and you obviously promote obesity in America...Obviously.
Whimsical Shoes-now, these need to be sensible tennis shoes with blue, yellow, and green swirls on them. These shoes will not likely get you the ultimate leadership opportunity-though they may allow you to work your way into congress or something. I think quirky might work for that.
Collared Shirt-You have to have a collared shirt...And a tie-otherwise, how on earth are people supposed to trust you? Well, if you're male-girls need a skirt. The skirt suit on girls says "I'm a business women" a lot more than it screams "elect me!" though.
Untucked Shirt-guys shirts must be tucked in. The flap in the back that covers your backside indicates that you're looking to cover your own behind before looking out for the team. While this may be a statement of truth, you want people to at least believe you're entirely sincere.
Puff Paint-Don't use this, it just makes you look like you tried to be crafty without any real tools available...
Yeah, those are the things I learned. Shallow? Critical? Cynical maybe? It's always possible...But Uffish is revealing werf's gender today, along with 'nyms-I'm sure you guys are MUCH more interested in that anyway. :)
Thursday, February 10, 2005
Driving Them Crazy
I think I'm starting to understand why it is that parents have a hard time when their children finally reach the "driving stage" of life. I know that my poor parents had no ability to replicate what I could make our small four door car do. That car hiccupped, wiggled, jumped and jived...though not often in a movement conducive to regular road travel. Sad day...at least for them. I actually didn't get my license until I was 19-this summer, in fact, right before coming back to school. Finally, I could drive.
It's funny how that made me feel different...even though it didn't really change anything about life...I still didn't have a car, I still use UTA, and I still enjoy walking.
My poor friend though, is currently in the "learning to drive" stage. For the sake of everything, let's call him Buddy.
In Buddy's family, you're not allowed to get your learners permit until you've gotten your Eagle, or your YW medallion. Buddy had just finished up presenting his project to the council, and was waiting in the Honda for his mom to come out once she was done with everything she needed to do.
Now, it was cold outside, as it tends to be this time of year. and Buddy decided that it'd be good to turn on the heater-a sensible choice, for a sensible young man.
He tried to turn on the heater and for some reason he thought he had to turn on the car...I don't know why he thought that...
He somehow popped the clutch and careened over the parking stopper thing, over the corner of a short brick wall, between 2 parked cars (he dinged one), past Scouters standing in the parking lot, through two parked cars scrapping and denting the passenger door (but missing the pickup that would have totaled the Honda and hurt him), past the parking lot blacktop edge, past 2 trees into the field about 1/2 way to that little church next to the scout office.
Apparently he didn't know how to stop the car and when he tried he hit the gas instead of the brake, and so he just turned the ignition off as soon as he made it through the parking lot.
Seems like a logical solution to me. Poor Buddy now doesn't really have any desire to drive...which is sad. I'm sure he'll do fine after a little bit of Driver's Ed, and some practice with someone who can tell him what he's doing...
Poor guy-best of luck Buddy...driving really can be quite enjoyable.
Saturday, February 05, 2005
"What is it? Night of the Weirdo's?"
Oh man...I'll let J get this one, but I just have to say that European Techno dances and trips to IHOP with good friends make life grand.
Also, Wal-Mart only likes you if you're buying something...go figure.
And one more thing: Sometimes we really do need to lean on someone...thanks guys :D.
Also, Wal-Mart only likes you if you're buying something...go figure.
And one more thing: Sometimes we really do need to lean on someone...thanks guys :D.
Friday, February 04, 2005
Teach Me all That I Must Do...
I'm really glad that my mother taught me how to do the things she expected me to do. She has very high expectations, granted, but never without first showing me how to do the things she asked.
I saw a mother today with her son, who, I would guess, is going to be starting classes in the summer. She walks up with her son to the registration desk, and barks, "Well, tell them what you need!" He looks taken aback, and scared to be on campus already, and then he looks at her with fright and says, "I don't know what I need." Poor kid; I'd be scared too!
That's not even all of it.
The woman then pushes this poor kid out of the way while rolling her eyes and says, "We need one of those registration books." The two girls working behind the counter don't know what she's talking about, and so they both attempt to clarify for a little while before determining exactly what it is that she wants. They explain where to find it, and she drags her poor son off to some other part of the building.
I certainly hope that I'm never like that as a mother, not even on the really, really bad days. No wonder some of the freshmen look so scared...
In other news, I'm changing my major. After wrestling with physics for a few semesters, I've realized that the hands on experimental stuff I love, but the tests and homeworks: blech! Then I realized that I probably shouldn't be placed somewhere making people do the things that I don't like. History teaching is still a go, but so is a trip to the Counseling Office to see if there's anything else that's right up my alley. Major changing's in the air...
I saw a mother today with her son, who, I would guess, is going to be starting classes in the summer. She walks up with her son to the registration desk, and barks, "Well, tell them what you need!" He looks taken aback, and scared to be on campus already, and then he looks at her with fright and says, "I don't know what I need." Poor kid; I'd be scared too!
That's not even all of it.
The woman then pushes this poor kid out of the way while rolling her eyes and says, "We need one of those registration books." The two girls working behind the counter don't know what she's talking about, and so they both attempt to clarify for a little while before determining exactly what it is that she wants. They explain where to find it, and she drags her poor son off to some other part of the building.
I certainly hope that I'm never like that as a mother, not even on the really, really bad days. No wonder some of the freshmen look so scared...
In other news, I'm changing my major. After wrestling with physics for a few semesters, I've realized that the hands on experimental stuff I love, but the tests and homeworks: blech! Then I realized that I probably shouldn't be placed somewhere making people do the things that I don't like. History teaching is still a go, but so is a trip to the Counseling Office to see if there's anything else that's right up my alley. Major changing's in the air...
She Should Teach Lessons...
How's this for equality between the sexes?
I take a 2.5 hour class every Wednesday. This past Wednesday, I witnessed a girl who can only be described with an analogy. Girl : Getting Digits :: Sheriff of Nottingham : Collecting Taxes
I'm not kidding.
I took some notes, mostly on stuff that we were talking about in class, but I also took note of her ritual. Watch for it boys, lest you too fall under her spell.
She comes into class a few minutes late, and sits next to a good-looking guy below me. I'm guessing they might have been vaguely acquainted beforehand, but I'm not sure. They're talking and being slightly flirtatious, and about 10 minutes after she sits down, she's scratching his back and they're getting along just fine. At one point she does the following:
1. Reach down slowly for bag
2. Pull out chap stick (blistex perhaps?)
3. Place chap stick back into backpack
4. Pull out sweet scented oil (OK, some would call it simply lotion)
5. Begin to use it- large dollop in hand first, then slow motions over arms and hands, rubbing particularly on elbows and fingertips.
6. Re-insert lotion in bag, and sit back to take notes again.
I think I may have even detected an elbow brush.
For some reason, the guy has to leave at the break, about an hour and a half into class. He gets up with a charge for her to "call him" and leaves. Not 5 minutes after guy #1 is gone, guy #2 enters the scene. He sits in the recently-vacated seat next to her, and they start talking.
I start paying attention to class much more hard-core at this point, and about 15 minutes later, I look down in time to see her receiving a business card from this guy with his number on it, and she starts the same ritual listed above again. "Lotioning and oiling, oiling and lotioning!"
Apparently though, it works...because she didn't have to get up once, and she came out of that classroom with two numbers, and the request to call them both...
Sunday, January 30, 2005
Cheese it-The Cops!
How do I get myself into these situations?
Ok, so last night started off well enough. There was a nice trip to see the very funny Divine Comedy, and then an excursion to Smiths for Ice Cream and Brownie mix, provided by a fellow writer. (Not named to protect his pseudonym...Don't even try and be sly there friend :) We were playing games in Smith's and picking out toppings. I was standing in front of the display of the hot fudge toppings, with some of the strawberry ones too, and somehow, I managed to knock one of the strawberry topping jars off the counter, while holding the hot fudge in my other hand. I caught the first jar of strawberry topping, and then tried to catch the next one that fell, and dropped the first, and then tried to catch the next suicidal strawberries thing, and the second one fell. All told, I ended up splattered with strawberry topping from the two shattered jars on the floor. Novel Concept's a klutz on isle 10, clean-up on isle 10...
Then it was back to my place of residence to make the brownies and eat the ice cream. Other friends who'd gone to see a later showing of DC came and joined us, and though some freshmen didn't exactly do things that were intelligent, or cool...(Oh well, what can you do?) the experience was still generally enjoyable. Then it was midnight, and time to climb on the Maeser Building! Huzzah!
So we climb a little-pillars and such mostly, and then we started to walk towards the RB and the amazing climbing tree there. We get sidetracked by the fountain behind the visitor center, and we all sit in it (there isn't any water in it though...it was just the concrete-kind of like Greece and the old speaking forums), wishing desperately that it was some kind of hot tub, because it was real cold. We sat there and talked for a bit, getting a preview of Smurf's blog today, and Smurfs, Wiggle, and J all head off for the tree, leaving me, Uffish, BamaBeau, and Wilhelmina Wafflewitz to sit and chat for a bit longer before joining the rest. We walk towards the trees when we hear Smurfs, and J telling us that there was a police officer that had stopped at the top of the hill and who was getting out of the car. Most of us were unaware of why this was problematic...According to Smurfs, it's illegal to walk around campus after 12:00, and it's technically trespassing. Yikes! What do we all do then? We take off running in the direction of the parking lot by the athletic building. What do we see there? A car parked right by the end of the sidewalk, which we all assume are also police...The parking lights are on! This is the pathway by the outdoor tennis courts, and there are bathrooms, suddenly we all seem to realize that we've got to go...Either that, or everyone else thought that I was trying to hide in the bathroom and decided to follow suit...I honestly just had to use the bathroom...Oh well. I walk out of there, and, through the brick wall divider between the two bathroom doors, I hear Smurfs say, "that's a car with it's parking lights on, that's a bad thing, walk slowly in this direction." So we all start walking back towards the Athletic Building, and we're discussing the fact that it's apparently illegal to be on campus. Smurfs then say, no, I've been caught on campus before..." To which a voice responds from up in the bushes, "you mean like now?" DUN DUN DUN!
We all stopped in our tracks, and look around kind of nervously. I'm trying to see who it is that said the stuff. The voice then proceeds to say, 'there's a car parked at the end of the sidewalk over there, with it's parking lights on." Thank you, that's just what had prompted our retreat in the other direction...We're all still standing there just looking up at the hillside, when the voice says, "I'm totally kidding, I'm not actually police, keep walking." Oh, funny.
We decide to stop our mad running, because we would end up looking guilty(er) than anything else. The rest of the trip back to my place and the car was pretty uneventful. There was a real good rolling down the hill by the Marriott Center though...Good times there, and some bread/ramen exchanging. Everyone went home, and I went upstairs to defrost...I can't ever seem to do that all the way...
What a great life. I even stayed awake for church today...Maybe I should start doing regular hour things though...Maybe...
Ok, so last night started off well enough. There was a nice trip to see the very funny Divine Comedy, and then an excursion to Smiths for Ice Cream and Brownie mix, provided by a fellow writer. (Not named to protect his pseudonym...Don't even try and be sly there friend :) We were playing games in Smith's and picking out toppings. I was standing in front of the display of the hot fudge toppings, with some of the strawberry ones too, and somehow, I managed to knock one of the strawberry topping jars off the counter, while holding the hot fudge in my other hand. I caught the first jar of strawberry topping, and then tried to catch the next one that fell, and dropped the first, and then tried to catch the next suicidal strawberries thing, and the second one fell. All told, I ended up splattered with strawberry topping from the two shattered jars on the floor. Novel Concept's a klutz on isle 10, clean-up on isle 10...
Then it was back to my place of residence to make the brownies and eat the ice cream. Other friends who'd gone to see a later showing of DC came and joined us, and though some freshmen didn't exactly do things that were intelligent, or cool...(Oh well, what can you do?) the experience was still generally enjoyable. Then it was midnight, and time to climb on the Maeser Building! Huzzah!
So we climb a little-pillars and such mostly, and then we started to walk towards the RB and the amazing climbing tree there. We get sidetracked by the fountain behind the visitor center, and we all sit in it (there isn't any water in it though...it was just the concrete-kind of like Greece and the old speaking forums), wishing desperately that it was some kind of hot tub, because it was real cold. We sat there and talked for a bit, getting a preview of Smurf's blog today, and Smurfs, Wiggle, and J all head off for the tree, leaving me, Uffish, BamaBeau, and Wilhelmina Wafflewitz to sit and chat for a bit longer before joining the rest. We walk towards the trees when we hear Smurfs, and J telling us that there was a police officer that had stopped at the top of the hill and who was getting out of the car. Most of us were unaware of why this was problematic...According to Smurfs, it's illegal to walk around campus after 12:00, and it's technically trespassing. Yikes! What do we all do then? We take off running in the direction of the parking lot by the athletic building. What do we see there? A car parked right by the end of the sidewalk, which we all assume are also police...The parking lights are on! This is the pathway by the outdoor tennis courts, and there are bathrooms, suddenly we all seem to realize that we've got to go...Either that, or everyone else thought that I was trying to hide in the bathroom and decided to follow suit...I honestly just had to use the bathroom...Oh well. I walk out of there, and, through the brick wall divider between the two bathroom doors, I hear Smurfs say, "that's a car with it's parking lights on, that's a bad thing, walk slowly in this direction." So we all start walking back towards the Athletic Building, and we're discussing the fact that it's apparently illegal to be on campus. Smurfs then say, no, I've been caught on campus before..." To which a voice responds from up in the bushes, "you mean like now?" DUN DUN DUN!
We all stopped in our tracks, and look around kind of nervously. I'm trying to see who it is that said the stuff. The voice then proceeds to say, 'there's a car parked at the end of the sidewalk over there, with it's parking lights on." Thank you, that's just what had prompted our retreat in the other direction...We're all still standing there just looking up at the hillside, when the voice says, "I'm totally kidding, I'm not actually police, keep walking." Oh, funny.
We decide to stop our mad running, because we would end up looking guilty(er) than anything else. The rest of the trip back to my place and the car was pretty uneventful. There was a real good rolling down the hill by the Marriott Center though...Good times there, and some bread/ramen exchanging. Everyone went home, and I went upstairs to defrost...I can't ever seem to do that all the way...
What a great life. I even stayed awake for church today...Maybe I should start doing regular hour things though...Maybe...
Thursday, January 27, 2005
I Have Been Blessed...
Guys, this is one of those, "all is right with the world" kinds of posts.
I'm grateful for days like Birthdays, because they help to give you a little reminder that there are people out there in the world who really are glad that you were born. In fact, some of those people even go so far as to make you feel downright welcome in this big scary world.
Those are the people to stick with.
Thank you to all who helped make me feel so very welcome in the world today. I absolutely love the feeling of being loved.
How's that for sappy, sentimental, and "disgusting?" ;)
I'm grateful for days like Birthdays, because they help to give you a little reminder that there are people out there in the world who really are glad that you were born. In fact, some of those people even go so far as to make you feel downright welcome in this big scary world.
Those are the people to stick with.
Thank you to all who helped make me feel so very welcome in the world today. I absolutely love the feeling of being loved.
How's that for sappy, sentimental, and "disgusting?" ;)
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