I go in tomorrow to get my wisdom teeth taken out, and then I take an experimental drug afterwards...or no drug at all...for about 24 hours. In return for this, I will get the knowledge that I have no wisdom teeth, and $160...I also don't pay a penny for them...other than the money I've already paid in bus fares.
I've realized my own humanity, in part...and in so realizing it, and the possibility(however small) that something could go wrong, and I could end up not only losing my wisdom teeth, but also my mental faculties...I figure I should make a will now, whilst I am still of 'sound mind' (guess everything really is relative).
To the RA's which I am pleased to work with--I give you my ID card, the powers of my Dining Plus, and the paycheck that should be coming from my second job in about two weeks--just pretend that I'm not gone...I'm sure no one will ever pick up on it.
To the Writers of the Board--You can have any aliases or reputation I might have acquired in the internet world...though that's not much. You're also welcome to my two assigned questions right now--I'd love for you to explain copyright laws and the history of the Oklahoma Sooners... ;)
To my Friends--You're welcome to take some of my other stuff--books, future road trips, good meals, etc. You just can't have my pillows...those are for Wafflewitz and LEB. I think Uffish gets my music collection too, all 17.5 gigs of it.
To My Best Friend--You can have all the pictures, and everything that the pictures might remind you of...you can also have the promise that I'll try not to be too drooling of an idiot...
To My Family...I think if I lost ALL my mental faculties, you'd be saddled with the burden of taking care of me...I probably should figure out some way to compensate you for that--I'll work on that.
Anyway...here's to free Wisdom Tooth Extraction, and the hope that I don't actually end up losing anything besides teeth. If I do...here's to hoping that someone else benefits from it :)
9 comments:
I was supposed to have my wisdom teeth taken out this last spring, but when they went in to take them out, my gag reflex flared up enough that they couldn't do it. They let me keep them.
All that, and I got to stay home that day eating pudding and watching the Lemony Snicket movie, anyway. Maybe I should schedule to have my wisdom teeth taken out more often.
My advice to you:
Don't eat so much yogurt that you tire of it. After a week of yogurt and jello, you don't want to see the stuff ever again.
Also, priesthood blessings are always nice helps in the healing process. Highly recommended.
Eat macaroni and cheese! That's what kept me alive this week! Also, tomorrow, have a frosty. And cheese. I love cheese. You can just break of little pieces and swallow it. Also, those crest brush-up things are really nice to have. When you can't really brush your teeth, you can use those. ALSO(this is my last also, i promise) watching Into the Woods will speed up the healing process. :) good luck.
I was out for a week after wisdom teeth surgery back when I was 16. Ugh. So.... Boomer Sooner.
Aww, Novel. Sympathy head pat. I'm sorry for the trauma of the experience, and I hope it wasn't all that bad. Can I come visit, when you get back?
Word of the day is dqalhybg, by the way.
Getting my wisdom teeth out was great! Unless you develop some kind of infection, it really should be fine. When else in your life do you get to have giant chipmunk cheeks? It's fun.
Man, this is so funny. I think I'll soon steal your idea and write a will on my blog. I had my wisdom teeth out, but the grew back. Can I get $160 too? I could sure use it, I tell you what.
I'm guessing collateral friends get jack squat. Oh well, at least I had the pleasure of knowing you. Drool in peace.
Dear really-me:
Come on, you know you're likely more than just collateral. I mean, we had Uffish chinese food and watched Wodehouse, I've also recognized you on campus at least twice now. I think we can say that you're part of the friend catagory.
As for getting something, well...I lived, and am actually not drooling, so it doesn't look like too many people get much of anything...sorry guys. Maybe you can have some other stuff later.
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