Tuesday, November 16, 2004

On the Street Where You Live...or I Do

I've decided that living where I do might be bad for my pride. I often find myself walking around feeling superior for no good reason at all. I'm likely not smarter than those around me, I'm not better looking, and I'm certainly not a greater person. And yet, I find myself having to actually remind myself of these things on occasion as I meander through the neighborhood. Some guy starts talking to his buddies about his date, or about a 'hot girl' that he plans on picking up on over the weekend, and I just want to look at the kid, shake my head, and tell him that everything will someday be better. Maybe if he grows up a little, he can get married or something. A group of girls giggles over some guy and starts plotting on how to make him theirs, and I want to stand up and fight against evil in the world and the games we play with each others heads. I've begun to realize the startling possibility that I may very well be subconsciously self-righteous. This is all very amusing, because I feel entirely inadequate at times. The even funnier thing (I bet you're rolling on the ground by now) is that I switch between these two feelings at the speed of girl's emotions...in case you're unfamiliar, that's extremely fast. Alas. Perhaps one day I'll find a nice spot of emotion to graze on...a bright sunny spot where I realize I can be better, and I work to become so, but I'm not so stinking stuck on my supposed superiority.

2 comments:

Scott said...

Wow do I feel your pain. I've often wondered if the world really is that stupid, or if they just hide all their smart thoughts away from everyone else.
Then again, I frequently indulge in the same kind of asinine intellectual mundanity you reference-- I wonder if it's to fit in, or if I really think that way?

Novel Concept said...

Yeah, I find myself doing the same thing. It's like when you say or do something that people think is out of character (that actually reveals some deeper aspect of yourself), and people respond in a way that makes you say, "just kidding!" I find myself sometimes feeling upset that I'm boxed into a category, but at the same time, I don't want to have other people step out of their categories either. After all, things are so much simpler when we're all safely tucked into our squares right? Wow, now I'm hypocritical too...